Inside Out (2015)

We love Pixar, don't we? Its like the best. Though the last several years have been hard on the company, we still know that we're going to get something good out of it... so long as it doesn't have cars in it.  You know how this review is going to go already.

I originally did not have interest in seeing Inside Out. It didn't seem like that interesting of a movie that I needed to pay to see in theaters. With the endless good reviews for it,  people posting spoilers on Reddit, and the fact that this has been a boring-ass summer, I went and saw it.

The first reaction once the movie was over was "aw that was cute." And not like how my reaction with Frozen which I thought was just "cuuuuteee (?)" just actually "cute." This is a very genuine film written by people that give a damn. However, the entire time watching this, I was thinking how I wouldn't want to see it again. I've seen the top Pixar films (Finding Nemo, Up and Wall-E) more times than necessary that I'm almost tired of seeing them, despite being very timeless. I want to be able to not get sick of Inside Out and enjoy it. I say that because the only downside of this movie is that there are some parts that drag. Similar to Princess and the Frog, the beginning and ending are great and exciting, but the middle can get tiring.

Regardless, there is a tremendous amount of creativity used in this film. Things I could never come up with even if I tried. Even if the plot is a little convoluted, the writing is very precise. The second thing has to be the acting. It is a bit surprising that most of the actors here have mostly done TV. They have done a few films here and there, but they're mostly known for their TV roles. The best has to be Louis Black, who was the major reason I wanted to see this film. This role was made for him and it is absolutely hysterical. The rest of the cast is equally as good. My favorite character has to be Bing Bong, but that may be because he is played by Richard Kind. There is something just so funny and genuine about his performance that I adore.

The basic theme of this film is something I admire as well. Aside from the fact that this film will be shown in every high school psychology class in the future, I like the idea of telling people is okay to embrace your feelings. Its okay to be sad, its okay to have bad days, you can't be happy all the time. The sick bastard in me was wondering what happens when someone has a mental illness or Alzheimers or something. What happens when  Riley enters her sexual awakening stages or has PMS? That would be hella interesting. So hella.

Otherwise this is a good film, not Pixar's best, but still done very well. Very smart and well thought out, which is something I cannot say for the other family films out there these days. Its going to win best animated feature, unless Zootopia or The Good Dinosaur blows people out of the water. I'm giving this film a good score despite not wanting to see it again, but that is to preserve its goodness.

Grade: A


Also, the short film, Lava, was adorable. I loved every minute of that. Definitely in the top 5 of Pixar's best shorts.

Grade: A+++

Jurassic World (2015)

Damn, from chubby to sexy af.

I have been waiting 10 years for this movie. Ever since I came across the IMDB page and there was a plot synopsis  involving T-Rexes with machine guns. There was points in time were this movie seemed like it was never going to happen.  Over the last 2 years, there has been a full swing of hype. Even more so this past month. I can't remember the last time a movie, aside from the Marvel ones, had so many commercials and product tie-ins. It seemed like every other commercial or item in the grocery store had something to do with Jurassic World. Regardless, I was still excited knowing full well this will be a blown out, Summer blockbuster.

I was mostly excited for this movie because Jurassic Park has always had a place in my heart. It came out the same year I was born and it has always been a movie I can watch a million times and not get sick of. I quote it so many goddamn times and I still laugh at all the dumb cheesy shit and get tense. I remember when I was little, I liked The Lost World more than the first. The idea of a T-Rex running around a city always scared me and I always thought it would something that would actually happen. Anytime I heard a loud noise outside my window while I was sleeping I was convinced it was a T-Rex. Looking back at The Lost World, it is a cheap sequel at the end of the day. I still enjoy it, but it is a bit of a let down if you compare it to the original.  I also remember when Jurassic Park 3 was coming out, it was a huge deal, then it kind of went away. Even still people seem to forget the 3rd one and you can't really blame them. It is not the worst squeal that ever was or ever will be, but it is forgettable with some really annoying characters. I must also mention that I did go to the Jurassic Park section during my visit to Universal Orlando and geeked out like the son of a bitch that I am. It felt like you were actually in the park had it been practical, though I was disappointed there wasn't a random goat on a leash. 

Jurassic World was pretty awesome. However, the first half of the movie was slow. I was getting a little worried once that bitchface red headed lady came in and the two unlikable children and the incompetent employees. It was like "Aw shit, this shit again?" What is with this franchise and annoying characters? Once the pacing picks up, it doesn't fucking stop. I can't remember the last time I loudly gasped in a movie theater or was clenching onto my hair. 

But for every awesome thing in this movie, there was at least one mildly retarded thing in return. Few examples (possible spoilers):

• No bitch in the history of bitches can run in cheap-ass, Payless heels all day and through the jungle. Why couldn't she run into Jimmy Buffets and grab flip-flops. I know they fucking have them!  Shits not the best buts its more practical anyway.
• Everyone in this movie is selfish and retarded.
• More use of CGI over practical effects. I know it is expected now that every movie has it, but it still a bit of a let down how little practical effects there were. What made the effects in the original look good even to this day was the lighting and equal distribution of practical and CGI. Regardless, these effects still look great, but there were times I don't feel like the actors were giving into it. 
• The product placement. I already said in my Pitch Perfect 2 review my issue with it and the difference between Necessary and Obnoxious PP. In all honesty, most of the PP here made sense. When you go to a theme park these days, there is PP and restaurant tie-ins everywhere. The plaza in the movie almost looked like City Walk at Universal Orlando. However, the fact that in this world everyone has a Samsung Galaxy phone and drives a Mercedes is a bit ridiculous. 
• What is with the annoying children in these movies? I'll admit these kids aren't as bad as some other movies but its a trend that people are getting sick of. 
• No Jeff Goldblum. 
• All the side character development shit. No one needs that, I don't need a human connection. I'd rather know the problems of the dinosaurs, thank you. 
• Everyone is in panic and being attacked by pterodactyls, KISS ME.
• I almost wanted to say "Wow! this is a great remake of Jurassic Park 3!" There so many similarities between the two. The lost boys, the pterodactyls, the characters going back to the original facilities, the "new dinosaur" that was said to be better than the T- Rex gets her ass kicked by a fucking T-Rex, etc.

All these problems will refrain me from giving this film a perfect score, but I still enjoyed the hell of it. My favorite aspect has to be the commentary about theme parks. Universal is basically making fun of itself and Disney. There were several nods mentioned throughout that basically points out the flaws of theme parks. How expensive everything is, the rush to find the next best attraction even it may not be safe, liability issues, covering up shit that has happened in the past, product placement, and others. I even noticed how they were poking at Disney World's Magic Bands and the way the guest relations people were doing the Disney Point. I mentioned before that the park itself had some similarities to how it looked in Universal Orlando as well. As someone who just got back from working at these places in Orlando, I found it all very amusing. 

Otherwise, my favorite things were your favorite things. Chris Pratt was great, and of course because he is on top of the world right now. Every single moment that involved a dinosaur had me at the edge of my seat. The fights between the dinosaurs and watching them eat people was as satisfying as cutting into construction paper. The part me that had me say "OH MY FUCK-" with a four year old child in front of me was when the Mosasaurus  came up from the water to take the Indominus. Also when the raptors were coming after the truck had me shit. The usage of new dinosaurs is always neat to see. I'm glad to see DNA Strand guy make a cameo along with BD Wong. John Williams score coming back always makes people happy. 

Overall, although it was not as good as the first, it was definitely not as awkward as the 2nd and 3rd. Take it for what it is: a fun popcorn movie that doesn't talk down to the audience. 

And for god sakes don't take your toddlers to see this. You want them to see dinosaurs ripping people apart? What the hell is wrong with you. Do you want them to end up like me?

Grade: A

Pitch Perfect 2 (2015)

I really cannot say a whole lot about this movie because I don't remember a whole lot, despite seeing it yesterday. It was not my intention to see it, my friends wanted to and I wanted to get out of the house.

I saw the first Pitch Perfect only a few months ago. My roommates had it on and I watched it just because most of my friends have praised it and I had still never saw it. It was basically the new Mean Girls for me, I avoided it for so long because I thought it looked stupid. Then when I finally saw it, it wasn't that bad. I didn't think it was amazing, and though it has basically the same comedic style as Mean Girls, it wasn't as good as that. There has been a trend with female-driven comedies that have ranged from good to bad, at least in my opinion. It has nothing to do with the fact they're mostly women in these films, women and men are equally as funny. I think it is mostly the writing and the "how many vagina jokes can I cram into a single scene" problem. I had a film professor that compared The Hangover to Bridesmaids (I fucking hate Bridesmaids, by the way) and asked why one wasn't as successful as the other. His conclusion was the inability to relate to the characters of Bridesmaids like you can to The Hangover. I find this relevant to most other female-comedies. No body talks or acts like the women in Bridesmaids or The Heat. The same way nobody acts or talks like the women in Pitch Perfect. I can't relate to any of these girls because I'm not a passive-aggressive, self-absorbed bitch like most of these characters in these films. I seem to be the only early-twenties female out there that doesn't fall for these mediocre movies and I miss the days of 9 to 5 and She-Devil, but that is beside the point.

Anyways, sorry for that tangent. Pitch Perfect 2 was mediocre at its best. The first thing that really bothered me about it was how it didn't really have a consistent plot and it seemed to sway away from it a lot. It became more of a series of events rather than one cohesive story. But who cares about that when there is a shroud of dumb jokes. I did laugh at most of them, I'm not going to lie. It was mostly the most random moments that I thought was funny because I'm so random lulz.

The second thing that bothered me was the product placement. There's 2 types of PP in my book: Necessary PP, and Obnoxious PP. This film had the latter. Necessary PP would be if a character would be drinking a soda, they wouldn't be drinking from a blank can, they would be having a Coca- Cola more than likely. Obnoxious PP would be the camera showing the character picking up the Coca-Cola and drinking it with the label staring down at the camera at all times. There may be one or two lines were the characters says "Hey, do you want a Coca-Cola? I love Coca-Cola" or whatever. Throughout this movie there is obvious PP for Pantene, Cover Girl, M&Ms, Beats Headphones, Apple and many more. There is one scene were the girls are getting ready in the makeup room and talking, and in the background is a bag with the huge letters saying COVER GIRL. Its bad enough there was already commercials for Cover Girl tying in with Pitch Perfect 2 for the last couple weeks. I find that shit really annoying and it feels like the movie was only made to be a commercial rather than for the story. I understand PP is used to help pay for the production and what-not, but most audiences are not dumb enough to need those products to stare them down in order to get a message.

The third thing is most of the main characters in this film just weren't that captivating to me. Anna Kendrick, though a good actress, just isn't that pretty to me like she is for Reddit. She has the case the "Bitch Face" and it just bothers me. Rebel Wilson is ok, but she can do better than making fat jokes all the time. Side note- why do people always make fun of her, and Melissa McCarthy, for being fat like they don't know it? They know it, they embrace it, they don't make it seem like being fat is a good or bad thing, move on. I didn't understand why there were a  few girls in the group that didn't have any lines compared to the other girls; why even have them? I found myself liking the side characters more than anything. David Cross and Keegan-Micheal Key were my favorites. Other than that, I didn't care for anyone's motivations or actions.

The forth thing is a song numbers. I don't like radio pop songs and that is what 90% of the songs they cover. It is also completely obvious that they had ghost singers the whole time. I know that ghost singers are used for most musical films, from West Side Story to Sweeney Todd, but they at least make it believable. I just was not getting into the auto tune, the remixing, the songs I hear over and over again on the radio and at the club that drive me up a wall. Some times there was just so many songs going in and out and all at once it got pretty jarring. The beat boxing was the only thing I enjoyed.


I really can't believe I just wrote so much for a movie I had no feelings for. I neither loved it nor hated it, and I do recommend it to others if they're into these kind of bubblegum movies. Join me again for Jurassic World, I am so goddamn excited for this movie.

Grade: C

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

Real hero of this movie.

FIRST OFF: Holy hell is there a huge gap between the last review I did and this one, and I am sorry for that (not that I have any followers or anything but yeah). Life has been crazy with work and school. I constantly had to ask myself, do I want to write a review or write this paper for school? In which I just took a nap instead. I want to go back into this, re-do this whole site and make this more of a career-thing. So anyway...

Someone said on YouTube comment that Mad Max: Fury Road is like a movie of heavy metal band album covers. This has been the most accurate description of this movie ever. You can take any shot from this movie, and put it on a heavy metal band album and it will work. It more so reminded me of the Twisted Metal game series, but I know that game has more based off of the original Mad Max series than anything else.

For the record, no I have not seen any of the Mad Max films. Sorry, I just haven't gotten around to it. I had no intention to see this movie originally. After hearing nothing but good things about it and how it seemed to be a "stop what you're doing and go see this" kind of movie, I knew I had to see it. I also had a feeling that this wouldn't be as good seeing at home on a tiny screen. After seeing it, the ticket price was definitely worth it.

What makes this movie work is the pacing, it never stops. Even during the movie's "break" moments, there is still tension to be had. My heart was racing the entire time. The other thing that makes it work is that its an action movie, and its not fucking retarded. Sure it is over the top as all hell, but in a good way.

If I had to nitpick anything from here, some of the editing was a bit jarring. I can tell there were some edits for theater release. An Unrated release is fer sure gonna happen. The other thing is that I don't understand how the slave girls have perfect skin. I wash my skin twice a day and it looks shitty. These girls live in dirt and sweat and they're perfect. But that doesn't matter.

My favorite thing about Mad Max had to be the soundtrack. My god it was so good, can we please get more film soundtracks with drums and electric guitar? All of the lead actors were also great. Most of them have proven themselves adaptable in any role, no matter how crazy they are. This only proves that more. All of the sets, props and effects are something that should be used as good examples for any inspiring filmmaker.

Overall, great film and is a lot of fun. It is definitely not for everyone, but still enjoyable for most. Now excuse me, I got testicles that dropped while watching this.

Grade: A